There are times in life I am left bewildered. This past year those moments have been often. In examining the events I have looked at my life and have seen where my behavior played a part, but playing the “what if” game did nothing but amass great guilt. Guilt I pointed directly to myself, allowing the blame to land at my feet. Well in good in taking a personal responsibility, it still did not change what happened. With not being able to change the past nor the events which transpired I had to come to a solution. Personal forgiveness. I was not brought up to side step my responsibility or to evade the consequences of my actions. I was suppose to remind myself daily all my wrongs and make sure I held myself accordingly. Unfortunately there is a fine line in knowing, admitting, and learning to let it go, something at the age of 51 I have not mastered. I want to be a good person. I want everyone to see a person of charm and goodness, but as long as I see myself as a monster a