There is much to be thankful for, living in rural Alabama. The trespassers upon my property are deer, possums, raccoons, and turtles. Occasionally, I can hear the cry of a bobcat. While I should be more cautious trekking in the woods behind my house, I can't help but feel a sense that I no longer have to fear gang members but the animals of the wild.
Blessed with the opportunity to rear my children in this idealistic setting, I have found that for my daughter the biggest obstacle has been the education system. I am the first to acknowledge she is not a strong academic student and still has a long way to mature in her general attitude. Yet, it is in the nature of youth to be raw, needing to learn to adopt the gentle responses in which the "adults" in her world are supposed to have mastered.
My daughter has always had a good idea of herself. There was a time when she became withdrawn and tremendously shy. With intervention from a wonderful program at the elementary school she attended in Rancho Cordova, California she was taught to find her voice. The counsellors proved to her that her feelings counted, her opinions mattered, and to remain true to her beliefs. She blossomed into a strong out spoken young lady.
When we moved to Alabama and enrolled her into the high school, I had not realized what she learned in California would be looked down on by some of the teachers, the administration, (in my opinion) the current Superintendent of her school. Sadly I found the strengths which were encouraged in California only caused her grief in Alabama.
Talking with other single parents of strong and opinionated daughters, I discovered they have had the same experiences. When our daughters can be hit, threatened by their classmates, and called demeaning names, it is our daughters who face disciplinary measures. Their tormentors, who are usually male, upper class, and from homes with both parents, face none.
I admit that some of the words my daughter has used in expressing her frustration are not words which should be used in public. When she has resorted to foul language, even in response to being called worse, I have stood behind the school in that she should have consequences. Proudly, even though she could have lied about her ill-chosen words, she always admitted when she has used them. Unfortunately, her honesty has never been considered by the administration. Only the fact she spoke them.
The Superintendent in an interview with the little local newspaper in our area, stated that students are unique individuals, each with their own story, and should be considered on that basis. When speaking with him his normal response usually states that every child must be treated exactly the same, with no consideration of their circumstances. In general, both statements are true. No child should face a bias; however, each child is unique. Each child learns differently, some have disabilities that are not always seen. They are unique in their cultural upbringing and how they react to their world. Every child MUST be assessed under these conditions.
For my daughter, her disability can not be seen, and is probably difficult to measure. I have tried to educate both the school administration and superintendent about, but it appears to fall upon blind eyes and unhearing ears. The superintendent has known my daughter has had suicidal feelings in regards to her treatment at her school, yet he has failed to assist in any intervention.
My daughter's physician, when hearing about her situation, finally gave me the lantern to light the way to help her. With President Bush's No Child Left Behind program there is an organization which provides a child advocate for educational situations. Immediately I contacted them. With the information they gave me, I have been able to enter my daughter into an educational program provided at the trade school. We have hopes it will prove a better thriving environment for her. There is still a long way to go, and I am waiting for her advocate to be assigned. My daughter, for the first time in three years, has become hopeful.
Because I pressed the issue by calling in an advocate, the superintendent no longer acknowledges my presence when he sees me out and about. I am sure by the time this is all over, I will have upset many others in my child's educational system. But as a parent, my priority will always be to my children, and furthering the career of politicians my last priority.
Ironically, my son, who shares the same point of views as my daughter, and who is just as out spoken, thrives in the school that has failed my daughter and her friends.
Blessed with the opportunity to rear my children in this idealistic setting, I have found that for my daughter the biggest obstacle has been the education system. I am the first to acknowledge she is not a strong academic student and still has a long way to mature in her general attitude. Yet, it is in the nature of youth to be raw, needing to learn to adopt the gentle responses in which the "adults" in her world are supposed to have mastered.
My daughter has always had a good idea of herself. There was a time when she became withdrawn and tremendously shy. With intervention from a wonderful program at the elementary school she attended in Rancho Cordova, California she was taught to find her voice. The counsellors proved to her that her feelings counted, her opinions mattered, and to remain true to her beliefs. She blossomed into a strong out spoken young lady.
When we moved to Alabama and enrolled her into the high school, I had not realized what she learned in California would be looked down on by some of the teachers, the administration, (in my opinion) the current Superintendent of her school. Sadly I found the strengths which were encouraged in California only caused her grief in Alabama.
Talking with other single parents of strong and opinionated daughters, I discovered they have had the same experiences. When our daughters can be hit, threatened by their classmates, and called demeaning names, it is our daughters who face disciplinary measures. Their tormentors, who are usually male, upper class, and from homes with both parents, face none.
I admit that some of the words my daughter has used in expressing her frustration are not words which should be used in public. When she has resorted to foul language, even in response to being called worse, I have stood behind the school in that she should have consequences. Proudly, even though she could have lied about her ill-chosen words, she always admitted when she has used them. Unfortunately, her honesty has never been considered by the administration. Only the fact she spoke them.
The Superintendent in an interview with the little local newspaper in our area, stated that students are unique individuals, each with their own story, and should be considered on that basis. When speaking with him his normal response usually states that every child must be treated exactly the same, with no consideration of their circumstances. In general, both statements are true. No child should face a bias; however, each child is unique. Each child learns differently, some have disabilities that are not always seen. They are unique in their cultural upbringing and how they react to their world. Every child MUST be assessed under these conditions.
For my daughter, her disability can not be seen, and is probably difficult to measure. I have tried to educate both the school administration and superintendent about, but it appears to fall upon blind eyes and unhearing ears. The superintendent has known my daughter has had suicidal feelings in regards to her treatment at her school, yet he has failed to assist in any intervention.
My daughter's physician, when hearing about her situation, finally gave me the lantern to light the way to help her. With President Bush's No Child Left Behind program there is an organization which provides a child advocate for educational situations. Immediately I contacted them. With the information they gave me, I have been able to enter my daughter into an educational program provided at the trade school. We have hopes it will prove a better thriving environment for her. There is still a long way to go, and I am waiting for her advocate to be assigned. My daughter, for the first time in three years, has become hopeful.
Because I pressed the issue by calling in an advocate, the superintendent no longer acknowledges my presence when he sees me out and about. I am sure by the time this is all over, I will have upset many others in my child's educational system. But as a parent, my priority will always be to my children, and furthering the career of politicians my last priority.
Ironically, my son, who shares the same point of views as my daughter, and who is just as out spoken, thrives in the school that has failed my daughter and her friends.
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