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Journey of Shyness and Social Phobia

I suffer from shyness to the point it has left me isolated. According to a variety of information I have read my shyness is borderline social phobia. I have always been shy; however, it has escalated over the years. Earlier on in my life I was able to “functional” in social situations. I did this by simply “acting” a part, the person I thought I should be in any given situation. Sadly, it came a time when this no longer served me and I simply withdrew.

My shyness, as I have discovered, has lead to a multiple problems. I am unable to correctly read body language or respond with correct body language myself. It has been pointed out to me the non-verbal clues I give out is one of being unapproachable. Though in reality, I am just scared hoping no one will see it.
As for small talk, I find myself unable to think of anything semi-intelligent to say after the basic “hello”. Of course, again, the clue is given I am not interested in conversing. Far from the truth for my thoughts keep me from speaking. Terrified what ever I might say may sound stupid thus me being viewed as such.

I have read many an article on body language, flirting, and how to overcome shyness. Each article makes it sound easy to do, maybe for the average person, but for those of us whose shyness has completely taken its hold these steps is not as easy as simply doing it. For with shyness come self-esteem issues, fear, anxiety attacks, and panic attacks.

This year I will try to actively bring myself back to a functional shy individual. Will I be successful? I don’t know. I just know I must bring myself out of isolation, stop waiting to live, and embrace life. I am sure I will falter from time to time, make a few social mistakes, but without trying there is no hope.

I will chronicle my attempts in hopes in doing so I will continue to take those steps. Maybe, learn something along the way which might help others.
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